By Ali Schiller
Your ability to manifest the things that you want in your life is directly proportional to your ability to make and keep commitments.First off, a commitment is not a goal. A goal is something that you would like to do but don’t necessarily know how you are going to do it. You may have a goal of doubling your income or retiring to your beach house in or simply being more present but you aren’t quite sure how you are going to get there. A commitment is something that you say you are going to do, that you know you can do, and how to do it. It doesn’t mean that it is easy for you but it means that you have all the information right now required to keep that commitment, otherwise you wouldn’t make it. We make commitments to ourselves all the time, things that we can do, things that we want to do, and many times in the areas that are the most important to us – like our health. So what happens when we keep them and when we don’t?
Let’s say you make a commitment today that you are going to workout three times and the deadline for completion is a week from now. If you get it done, you are going to feel great, confident, and it will put you in a state of feeling like you deserve those bigger goals that you are reaching for. If you do not complete your commitment, you will likely rationalize why you couldn’t get it done or fall back on an excuse. But it requires you to be in a state of not enough to accept the excuse. It some way you didn’t have what you needed to get it done, but remember when you made the commitment you did. So in order to be okay with not doing what you said you were going to do, you have to believe you don’t have everything you need. A place of lack, deficiency, not enough, and you think that feeling just applies to working out and this one little commitment that you made, but it doesn’t, it becomes a general attitude, that works against you, and keeps you feeling like you don’t have enough time, money, support, you name it.
Now that brings us to accountability. Accountability means observation without judgment. It is asking the question, did you do what you said you were going to do? The simple act of allowing others to observe whether or not something got done, creates a context around the commitment. If you get your commitments done, it feels great to share that with other people and in turn it may inspire them. But when you don’t keep your commitments, instead of walking around with a “not enough” excuse weighing you down, you have an opportunity for growth. You get to look at your actions and ask, what got in my way?
In an accountability group you are having this conversation with people that are not invested in what you do or don’t do. They simply look at what you said you were going to do, and what they heard you say about why you didn’t get that done, and give you feedback. It’s a process that can be uncomfortable. No one wants to be the person that didn’t do their commitments, so in way knowing you are going to be held accountable will pull you through most of your excuses, but with the things that you really struggle with, it may not be enough. That’s when growth happens, with your actions or lack thereof under observation, your excuses give way to the truth of what’s stopping you, and you can learn from it.
The better that you get at keeping your commitments the more intentional you can be about your state of mind. You can purposefully keep yourself in a place of “I deserve it”. You feel worthy. This is a high integrity place, it’s a place where you trust yourself, you trust in your word, because you do what you say you are going to do. This is a confident you, this is a you that is open to new opportunities and is willing to take risks. This is a place of abundance and generosity.
The better you get at making and keeping your commitments the faster you will manifest the things you want in your life. Why? Because you deserve it. And you know what? You really do.
Ali Schiller is a philosopher and truth seeker at heart. A trainer, traveler, wife, mother of two, writer, entrepreneur, former real estate agent, who just so happens to have her degree in Mechanical Engineering. www.alischiller.com (p.s. she is also an amazing friend!)